From a young age, I had this burning desire to make something of myself, help people, make a difference. Fiercely independent and excited for the future, I knew I was meant to do big things. Growing up in a small town, my heart was screaming for something more.

The world was going to know my name.

Getting into college was always on my mind. Being a famous author or hard-hitting journalist was the ultimate dream. But, like many young girls, my junior year of high school, I got swept up in young love. The focus on myself slipped away and I changed. I got married right after I graduated and moved to Texas with my husband, who was fresh out of boot camp. My role became that of a military wife, and, soon after, a mother to our son.

After getting divorced a few years later, I bounced around from minimum wage job to minimum wage job. I even went back to school to become a Medical Assistant. It wasn’t something I ever had an interest in doing, but I had bills to pay and a son to provide for. After I graduated I obtained an okay job at the site I had interned for. The pay was crap, but it came with benefits, and they were flexible with my schedule, which was necessary as a single mother. Life wasn’t horrible, and there were aspects to my job that I liked a lot, but it was getting stagnant.

I have this habit of putting my whole heart into something, and rather than dipping my toes in, I dive head first.

I guess you could say I do that with most things. Much like my professional life, my love life was just as disappointing. Multiple relationships all ended horribly. When I met a much older guy who came in ready to offer me everything I thought I wanted, I leapt into that water without a life raft to save me. Two years down the road, I was still stuck in a rut, feeling like I was never going to be satisfied, like I was never going to make something of myself or do anything worth a damn. That relationship, like everything else, was no longer enough.

After that relationship, I did settle down and marry the love of my life. Shortly after I quit my job as an MA, I leapt into the unknown once more and went back to school. Fast-forward to five years later, I am still in school perusing a bachelor’s degree in English and creative writing. I had originally majored in something else entirely but eventually found my way back to my first love. A lot of people think I am crazy to pursue a degree that most consider useless. Okay, I will admit, there are a lot of days I have my doubts as well.

It’s normal to question whether you have made the right choices; to fear you have made yet another mistake after you have already made so many.

Now, one year from graduation, I sit contemplating earning a second bachelor’s degree before I pursue my master’s. I have four kids, I am 31 years old, finally about to graduate, and I am considering putting myself through a few more years of school. It sounds insane when you say it out loud. Is this just another case of me being unsatisfied? Maybe. Or maybe I am finally coming into my own. Maybe all of my schooling and life experiences have led me right here to this moment. If I had tried this 13 years ago, it’s possible I would have failed miserably.

If I hadn’t taken the long route, climbing roadblock after roadblock, dragging myself through the mud, it’s likely I wouldn’t have had the drive to push myself harder than I ever have before.

You see, having to fight for everything I have has humbled me. Having to pull myself out of the darkest holes has shown me that it’s okay to stumble and fall because you will rise again. Raising children has taught me how important it is to follow your dreams, no matter how ridiculous or scary they may seem. Taking detours has helped me to discover who I truly am, who I was meant to be all along. It’s forced me to listen to my heart and trust myself. These are invaluable lessons that often cannot be learned by staying on the same path.

As I get older the road gets a bit more difficult to navigate and the destination a little harder to see. There is always the possibility that I could get lost a few more times before I end up going in the right direction. It’s cheesy, but they say, “life is about the journey and not the destination,” and I’m starting to realize how much truth there is to that. I have been so focused on not being where I had hoped to end up, that I failed to realize how boring life would be if I had already reached the finish line. If the value and success of one’s life is measured in moments and experiences, then I have lived one hell of a life so far, and I’m only 31. I have so much left to learn, to live, to see and do.

So I encourage you to take the long way around.

Keep moving. Keep living. Go after the things you want most, whatever that might be. Age is just a number; it’s never too late to start over or dream another dream. Overcome your own fears and take a few detours. Life might not work out the way you planned, but maybe, just maybe, it will be better than you had originally imagined….